Since becoming a mother, I’ve learned I am dead dog last on the priority list of people. I secretly day dream of someone in my immediate or extended family noticing this. After taking notice they extend an offer to let up on their demands or let me escape to take care of me. Then reality hits, I wake up and I remember the cold, hard truth. They don’t. They won’t. I need to take care of me! So my darling friend if you find yourself in the same place, here are my top five survival skills.

1. Cozy up with failure and get some perspective.

You aren’t perfect. They aren’t perfect. It’s not getting all done. Things will be a mess. Be ok with this. If you’re not, you may miss the real magic and meaning of moments.

And for Pete’s sake, on the days you want to be so mad your kids have stains on their shirts and boogers on their face while the neighbor’s kid is wearing freshly pressed smocked garments with clean as a whistle darling faces. Stop and realize we are all so rich in so many ways. We have water, food, shelter, religious freedom, safe neighborhoods. Get over yourself if you miss a monogram here or there. We are spoiled Americans and we act like it often. This perspective always snaps me back to a place of gratitude and better attitude.

2. Seek a tribe.

Women are not meant to survive life alone. Whether you think you deserve the time or not, seek community in other, like minded, supportive women. If you don’t find your niche, keep trying. Church. Work. Online. Bible Studies. The gym. Get yourself around other women who make you feel like it’s ok and you’re ok.

3. Find older mentors.

Look to your world for older and wiser women to guide you through life’s various stages. They are out there and they are willing to serve us if we only ask.

4. Understand life pauses and seasons.

There is a time and a place to train for a marathon, raise an organic vegetable garden, read 750 books in a row. I’m finding that time isn’t now. Monitor your energy level. What do you need to do to survive? What do you need to do to fill your cup and the cup of your family? This defines our season ladies, not what we think we “should” be doing. Learn when it’s time to hold and when it’s time to fold. Some things can wait for a slower, different time. There is no shame is pressing the pause button on some of our life to do lists. I don’t ever want to miss out on the preciousness of my family’s young days because I couldn’t slow my roll.

5. Clear the roadblocks.

Here’s the tough but really necessary part. If you find yourself in a place you can’t hitch up with the ideas above, because of shame, pressure, anxiety, stress, abuse, your past or something else really gross well, you need to get help. You sure as tooting would not walk around for years with strep throat without eventually going to the doctor. Same applies for our heart, mind and soul. Get professional counseling, join a support group or seek medication if you feel stuck in a pattern or rut you can’t get out. There are so many professionals and organizations here to serve! It’s ok to seek so you may heal and deal. Everyone will be better for it. That’s a guarantee.

Bless you, sweet reader. Take good care of you this day and all days.

meg-at-the-end

Hi all! It's Meghan here. Now that you've been formally introduced to each writing staff member with last month's storied series, I wanted to give each writer the full palette this month with this new series entitled: OUR FIVE BEST.

I'm taking a minute at the conclusion of each post to shed some light on just exactly what makes each writing staff member a wonderful part of meghancobble.com. Check out the goodness and strength that Christy brings to this online team from my heart in the image below. Her favorite jelly bean is Jelly Belly's tutti fruiti. Head on over to the shop and nab a bag o' writers to grab yourself some writing inspiration. Words are most certainly worth it.