{believing}

I can't quite settle on exactly what Christmas completely represents to me.  It's all so many emotions and all so many feelings attached to this season we call December.

I hear people say, "Christmas is hope."  Or, "Christmas is the celebration of our Savior's birth."  And "Yes, but it's family & love."  Oh and, "It's presents and gatherings."  Without a doubt, "It's so often heartache too."

And, I think, I believe them all.  I believe this festivity we create, this so much we can muster, is really the outstretched of our humanness to connect.  To tactilely manipulate our arms further upward towards an Earthly reveal.  This disclosure is just a wee bit more proof that we really are here.  Present in the flesh with a heavenly below, "we believe."

The boys and I finished up our Advent Tree on Christmas Eve.  We had a handful of ornaments that were still left to be created.  Out of town travel and under-the-weather days are just preemptive reminders of flexibility at its finest.

I loved my time in our kitchen reading with them through the Bible and designing the last of our ornaments.  It was slow.  It was intentional.  It was a bit hectic with a whole lotta hot glue. But it was ours.  Our moments to connect our humanness to Him just a little bit more.

I love what Eli said when speaking about faith:

"Mom, believing begins in your heart.  It can't be explained for the mind to fully understand. That would make trust way too easy for all us. And trust is about a feeling not a fact."

That boy.

Our family was a part of the Christmas Eve candlelight service at our church.  I wanted to remember the realness of that experience.  I instagrammed my favorite take aways from that night.  I love this social media outlet.  Photos with words right at the tip of my fingers to tap back into anytime I want are so nice. In this fast paced, one-uppin' world, I am choosing social media for good.

Home.  It makes believing a bit more possible.  It's the shell we call ours.  It's the place where faith is planted. What we choose to make of the inside is where these very beliefs build.  Santa vs. no such thing?  Invest in your story of home. That's my vote. Build upon truth and the celebration will never disappoint.

Our traditions are becoming a part of us.  The trimmings under the tree change from year to year.  From sparse to abundant, the gifting goes.

The parental insides of  us want so very badly to gift it all.  And yet, somehow Kenny and I find comfort in the balance of simplicity.

For the years of sparsity are just as sacred as this year's abundance.

Our last gift to one another was the one we worked on all December.  You can read about it here.  Watching as affirmations, thankfuls and blessings were read around our kitchen table, was so powerful for our family of 4.

• "Thank you for being a kind brother to me."
• "Dad, I follow you in most all of the choices you make.  I want to be like you."
• "Best smile in America."
• "Casey, I love to watch you play. You have such a tenacious spirit."
• "Eli, your attention to detail is so very noticed.  You think of others before yourself."
• "Thank you for working so hard for our family."
• "God, I trust you with your plan for our family's life."

Christmas. It's where our hearts reach both laterally and vertically.  It's the gift of time.  It's the safe spending of money. It's memories clutched-wadded in our hands reminding us that we are most certainly here.  Present in the flesh with a heavenly below, "we believe."  A feeling not a fact.  I like that very much, Eli Garrett.

To read the entire {bringing to Christmas} series, visit here.